The Jamcracker Diet

Are you tired of spending money on those new fangled “fad” diets that claim to work, but don’t?

You’ve tried them all, but finally here’s a diet that is guaranteed to work or your money back.

It’s simple, it’s easy, and it’s all yours for absolutely Free…That’s right.

There’s no crazy schedule.  You don’t have to keep a journal and log down every bit of food that enters your mouth.  It’s so easy, you don’t even have to buy a book and read it seventeen times to understand it.  And best of all, it’s the cheapest diet known to man. 

Here’s how it works.

Just drink one delicious glass of water for breakfast.

And then another nice delicious glass of water for lunch.

There is nothing in the world like “not eating” that will make you lose weight faster.

Here’s the best part.  You can have anything you want for dinner.  Anything at all.

However, you can only eat once per day.  Sit down and eat your evening meal no sooner than 4 o clock.  The closer to bed time you eat, the better.  Going to bed hungry is not so much fun.  I know someone who takes a sleeping pill while he is dieting so he won’t be tempted to eat late at night.  I don’t think I would actually do this, but hey, to each his own.

After you stop eating dinner, don’t eat anything else.

This diet gets your brain in “will power” and “self-control” mode.  Once you start nibbling on something, it’s hard to stop eating.  So just say no to everything all day long and reward yourself every night with a satisfying meal.

You can drink as much as you want during the day as long as you are not consuming calories.  Don’t drink artificial sweeteners.  They have been scientifically proven to give you the munchies. 

I have had people tell me that this diet is not healthy.  I beg to differ.  I met a doctor from India who fasts for three days every few months.  He said this is completely healthy.  It cleanses the body.

After I had twins, I weighted 180 pounds.  If I stayed at that weight, I could have had all sorts of health problems.  Obesity has been linked to cancer, diabetes, arthritis, heart disease, etc. 

It’s just not as easy to be light on your feet and full of energy when you are carrying around extra weight. 

I don’t starve myself all day long on a regular basis.  I just do the diet until I get to the weight I want.  Then I try to eat a balanced diet, and If my pants get too tight, I do the Jamcracker diet until they fit again. 

The first couple of days is kind of rough, but the stomach shrinks and adjusts and you get used to it. 

If I know that I am going to go somewhere for dinner in the evening and I will be tempted to eat way too much, I don’t eat all day long.  When I get to the party, I eat whatever I want.  I look like that skinny girl who can just eat whatever she wants without gaining weight. 

I am five foot 4 and a half inches tall.  My weight range is 115 to 140 pounds. I like to stay at 120.  I’m not anorexic.  I like food.  I don’t think I’m fat.  I don’t over do dieting.  Sometimes I diet and sometimes I don’t. 

I didn’t actually make up this diet.  I stole it from a guy. 

I used to work at the BroadRipple Subway in Indianapolis, Indiana.  I worked with this fat guy there for a while.  He quit, and came back to visit a few months later and he looked “HOT.” 

I asked him how he lost so much weight.  He told me “The Guy Diet.”  I said “The Guy Diet? What’s that?”

He said “You only eat one meal a day.”

The guy asked me for a hug.  Someone told me later that he had a huge crush on me and wanted to go out.  I was with an overweight psychopath at the time who laid on the couch and ate food from Long John Silver’s all day long.  I wish I had left my crazy guy for the hottie.”  Oh well.  I guess I have rambled of subject once again.

Here are some interesting diets that I have heard of:

Tim Ferris Diet:

Available in the book “The Four Hour Body”

It’s basically a slow carb diet.  You eat nothing but beans and meat for six days.  Then on the seventh day, you binge eat and it supposedly helps you loose weight.  My husband tried this diet and lost 2 pounds per week.  It was extremely expensive.  I tried it for three days but quit because it made me feel sick and constipated.

Atkins Diet:

I guess most people have heard of this meat and cheese diet.  You know what happened to Dr. Atkins?  He’s dead.

Paleo Diet:  This one is actually kind of fun.  Basically you don’t eat processed grains like bread, rice, and cereal.  You eat meat, vegetables and fruit.  There is a book for this diet and it makes the diet extremely complicated and frustrating.  I follow a modified version of this sometimes when I seem to be gaining a few pounds.  It seems like I gain weight fast when I am eating from the bread group.

Raw Vegan Diet:  This one was a fun diet.  I did it for a month and lost 8 pounds.  I had a lot of energy and felt light and airy.  I was extremely hungry though.  I got down to 115 pounds and called it quits on that one. 

Watermelon Diet:  I made this diet up.  Buy watermelon with seeds.  Eat tons of ice cold watermelon…seeds and all…for breakfast and lunch.  Then eat a sensible dinner.  Eat watermelon for snacks any time you want.  I lost five pounds doing this one week.

1000 calorie diet:  I had a friend in High School who lost 100 pounds on this diet.  It’s simple, but I tried it once buy only eating a small sandwich for all three meals.  Each sandwich is about 300 calories or so.  It works. 

A diet is only a crash diet if you let it become one.  If you totally blow it one day and binge eat because you are starving….don’t worry, try again the next day.  According to Tim Ferris, one day of binge eating can actually help you loose weight, as long as you only do it once a week.  I don’t binge eat though.  That’s disgusting.  But you can do it if you want to.

You don’t actually have to diet, though.  Plenty of people are overweight and completely happy about it.  But if you are not, I highly recommend the Jamcracker diet.  You don’t have to do it though.  The only thing you have to do is pay taxes and die.

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