My son broke his most prized possession, his whole reason for living, his whole whole world is coming to an end.
You wouldn’t think a ninety nice cent dish scrubber could do that much damage, but they don’t make stuff like they used to.
My son told me that he thinks he has bad karma from being so mean to his little brothers and sister. He feels so horrible and said he hated himself for being so stupid. We’re making him pay for a new one. We don’t believe that the dish scrubber just spontaneously slipped out of his hand and went flying across two rooms at full force into the Television set.
We don’t have cable. That TV is actually the monitor to the family computer. We have to have a new one because he’ll need it for his online school in the fall.
Although the television set is sometimes the bane of my existence, it has it’s redeeming qualities. There is a website that we use a lot called brainpop. It teaches facts about things like Math, Science Social Studies, and English. It’s entertaining enough for the kids to actually watch without feeling tortured.
My oldest son has watched all of these videos. He is also a bit of a computer whiz and he knows how to fix a computer if it’s had a virus. When he was in the 5th grade, he showed his teachers all sorts of things about power point that they didn’t already know.
A television set hooked up to cable or a salivate dish can make you stupid, but a television set hooked up to a computer, can make you absolutely brilliant.
The TV has the power to do evil, but it also has the power to do good. We’ve got well over a thousand audiobooks that we have downloaded on the computer with the broken monitor, and it’s really hard to get them onto the mp3 players without the use of that TV screen.
My son is going to start online homeschool in the fall and we really need a new monitor for that computer. He’s destroyed a very important piece of equipment.
I want my son to know the consequences of his actions, but at the same time, I don’t want him to suffer depression and get suicidal. So I told him the story of my cabbage patch doll.
Oh, don’t worry, I didn’t tell him the story about that lady who couldn’t have a child and prayed to the devil that her cabbage patch doll would come to life, and then it did, and killed her and her husband. No, I don’t tell my kids that kind of story.
When I was a little girl, I had this bald cabbage patch kid with bright green eyes. I loved her eyes, they were this amazing bright green like fresh green grass.
I loved that doll, I treated her like she was my own child. One day, I decided to wash the head of my doll because it was starting to get dirty. Ordinary soap and water just didn’t do the trick, so I used isopropyl alcohol on a cotton swab and it worked. The dirt came right off. I was so excited that I just kept rubbing the whole doll’s head and then I rubbed the alcohol over her eyes.
The eyes of cabbage patch dolls are just painted on with cheap paint. The alcohol was strong enough to smear the paint. I ruined one of the eyes of my favorite doll. I was horrified. It was one of those horrible moments of live where you wish to God that you are only dreaming, but you can’t because it really happened. I felt sick to my stomach, I wanted to die. I couldn’t believe what I had done, especially what I went through to get that doll.
…or, at least he thought he was.
Back in 1983 when Cabbage Patch Dolls first came out, they were this huge fad. Everybody and their dog wanted a cabbage patch doll. There was so much demand for these dolls, that stores could not keep them stocked. Some people were buying Cabbage Patch Dolls on the black market for hundreds of dollars. My dad heard about this, and his eyes lit up with dollar signs. We drove around endlessly trying to find Cabbage Patch Dolls so my dad could sell them at coin shows and become independently wealthy.
For months we searched for these dolls, and then the big day came. My dad got insider information. The Wal-Mart in Denison, TX, just got a huge shipment of Cabbage Patch Dolls. They would go on sale Saturday, December 19, 1983, at 9:00 am when the doors open.
My dad and I prepared and showed up at Wal-Mart that Saturday morning, an hour before the doors opened. I guess a whole lot of other people were given the same secret information because one hundred people showed up by the time the store opened, and they were all there for the Cabbage Patch Dolls.
My dad knew there would be a lot of competition for those dolls, so as the store manager unlocked the front doors, he said “Clotilda, I want you to run as fast as your little legs will carry you and grab as many of those dolls as you can carry.”
The doors opened and there was a mad rush for those dolls. I had never seen so many old fat ladies run like that. I managed to grab a box holding a Cabbage Patch Doll, seconds before they were all gone. The one I got had brown curly hair and a pacifier, but some old lady didn’t like the one she got and she asked if I would trade. I was used to getting stuck with stuff that I didn’t like, so I traded for an ugly bald doll with green eyes.
My dad had really intended to sell the doll for profit, but he saw how much I wanted my very own Cabbage Patch Doll so he let me keep it and he continued his quest for more Cabbage Patch Dolls.
A few months later, we were out shopping and my dad jumped for joy, there were thirty boxes of Cabbage Patch Dolls just sitting there on the shelves. My dad bought every single one of them. For the next few years my dad tried everything he could to sell those dolls at a profit. Nobody would buy them from my dad.
There was a rumor going around town about a demon possessed Cabbage Patch Doll and most kids that we knew were terrified of them.
Years went buy, and my dad finally just started giving them away to friends, neighbors and other unfortunate souls who did not own a cabbage patch doll and had not heard the horror story.
Buying those Cabbage Patch Dolls was a really stupid thing to do. Sometimes you think you are doing the right thing, and you still make a mistake. Like the time I called the spinkler repairman and he said that it would cost $750 to fix the sprinkler system. I told him that was a rip off. He wouldn’t leave until I gave him a check for $350. So we had him fix the sprinkler system. It took him thirty minutes to fix the problem and it cost us almost a thousand dollars. The sprinklers broke again the next month. Now that was a stupid mistake.
I could go on forever about the stupid things that I have done, but I won’t. Some things are far to humiliating to speak of.
We still need to get a Television set. I hear that Wal-Mart is having a big sale on TVs this Saturday. The first ten customers can buy a 200 inch plasma TV for only ninety nine dollars. I think I might have to make a run for it.