Sugar in a Fruit’s Clothing

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It’s so hard to get kids to eat their candy these days.  That’s why scientists have come up with this

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It’s pure refined sugar, disguised as something healthy, so you can trick your kids into eating it.

Here’s another innovative way to get kids to eat their sugar, make it look like sushi.

I keep seeing this in family magazines at the dentist’s office.

http://0.tqn.com/d/candy/1/0/_/2/-/-/candysushi9.jpg

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If you make the sugar look healthy, then the chemical structure magically realigns into a nutrient rich food great for the development of healthy cells.

Here’s one that I just don’t get.  Fruit snacks are a teacher approved food and are allowed in school lunches because they are made with fruit.

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But Jelly Belly jelly beans are made with mostly real fruit puree, and they are not allowed in school lunches because they are considered candy.  Perhaps the Jelly Belly company should make their candy shaped like fruit, label it made with real fruit and stick it in the healthy snack section.

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This one day, I was grocery shopping with my kids and they were giving free samples of this new healthy snack called pirate’s booty.

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The lady handing out snacks went into detail explaining how extremely healthy this food is because it’s made of rice.  She told me that these little cheese flavored Styrofoam packing peanuts are all natural.

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Okay, well then.  Wheat is all natural, and doughnuts are made from wheat and so doughnuts are healthy.  Chocolate candy bars are healthy and all natural because sugar comes from sugar beets and sugar cane, and those are all natural green plants.  And chocolate comes from the cacao bean, and so it’s healthy.  Potatoes are healthy so chips are healthy.  Corn is healthy, it’s an all natural grain so fritos are healthy.

People spend a lot of time and money trying to find a new diet.  They spend loads of time and money on exercise programs. It seems like the main topic of conversation of everyone I eavesdrop on.  Everyone I know and everyone I see just seem to be getting fatter and fatter, and I know it’s offensive and rude, so I don’t say anything, but these people are going to develop serious health problems that can all be eliminated if they would just eat real food.

This is real food

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Okay, my dad eats three shreds of lettuce on his cheeseburger and calls that his serving of veg.  I don’t mean add this food to your existing diet, I mean, instead of eating mostly bread and processed foods, I mean eat mostly fresh fruits and vegetables and a small amount of processed food. 

Instead of eating 90 percent processed food and 10 percent fresh fruits and vegetables, try to go for 80 percent fresh fruits and vegetables and 20 percent processed foods. 

You can eat fresh, uncooked, fruits and vegetables all day long and snack and snack on them constantly, and still loose weight.  Carrots, apples, blueberries, bananas, these are all healthy foods.  A lot of people say that they are filled with carbohydrates that will turn right into sugar, so they just don’t eat them…and then they grab a slice of cherry cheesecake and call it healthy.

However, I have eaten giant bowls of blueberries, tons of bananas, and loads of carrots, and lost weight eating this type of food…hmm. 

I used to think that fats, oil and meat made you fat, so I ate mostly bread. Eating this way made me slowly gain twenty pounds over a period of about ten years, and that’s with me not eating snacks, only drinking water, and “dieting” several times a year with diet pills and canned chocolate nutraslim. ( I used to hate fruits and vegetables, but I slowly added them to my diet until I liked them.  (I weighed 145 pounds before I had children, and 180 pounds after the birth of my twins)

I have made an interesting discovery.  When I don’t eat any bread or processed grains like crackers. I weight 115 pounds, and stay at that weight (I looked it up, that’s actually within a healthy weight range for my height).  But if I eat bread like pizza and tortillas, I gain a pound every couple of days. 

I’m not entirely convinced that eating bread and processed foods makes people obese though, or overweight.  I think that if you drink your calories, that’s what does it.  All the people that I know who are overweight, drink sugary drinks, like the happy hour slushies at sonic, or juice, or milkshakes, or the flavored Starbucks lattes. 

According to Scooby the body building guy, drinking 1 sugary drink a day can make you gain 2 pounds per month…24 pounds per year.

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And according to the Ted Talk that Jamie Oliver gave, heart disease is the leading cause of death in the United States.  The runner up is Cancer, and both can be prevented by eating fresh fruits and vegetables.

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He makes a point that homicide is way down at the bottom of causes of death, yet everyone is totally focused on that one, and ignore the causes of death at the top. (The chart is easier to read during his Ted Talk…and by the way, in case you don’t know….TED Talk is this convention thing….where smart people give talks on the stuff they know about…I like to watch them for fun in my spare time.  My favorite is the one by Malcolm Gladwell on Spagetti Sauce, but that is so off subject.)

http://www.ted.com/talks/jamie_oliver.html

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Here’s a video of me making a veggie filled sub for my teenage son.

 

Oh, and be sure and drink your vodka, it’s healthy because it’s made with real potatoes, and potatoes are vegetables. ( I stole that one from my son).

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About clotildajamcracker

oddball fiction writer and suburban food forest gardener. I'm into debt free living and tightwadding. I have lots of money saving tips and recipes, gardening advice and interesting stories on my website www.clotildajamcracker.com I am saving up to plant a huge food forest ecosystem using permaculture and other sustainablity methods that will save the earth from the evil minions who want to cover it with shopping centers, parking lots and factories. http://clotildajamcracker.wordpress.com/ My children's books are currently available on Amazon http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=clotilda+jamcracker Some of my art is available at www.redbubble.com http://www.redbubble.com/explore/clotilda+jamcracker

54 Responses »

  1. Sub movie was both informative and funny. Thanks! I will adapt the makings for being diabetic (use my special bread and call it just a sandwich).
    You and Bill Cosby! He says chocolate cake is good for breakfast because it has milk, eggs, and bread (flour) in it.

    • I’ve tried mixing wheat flour into bread and pizza dough, but it gives the bread a biscuit type flavor. Oats don’t seem to do that. Our pediatrician told me to add oats to pancakes to add in a little nutrition. Nobody ever seems to mind and I think it gives it a better flavor than just plain white bread.

      Oh, and I’m glad you like the elephants. They’re my favorite.

  2. “Here’s another innovative way to get kids to eat their sugar, make it look like sushi.” I need to get my hands on that. I’m allergic to real sushi so the next time my friends decide to grab some sushi I can pull out that bad boy and be all like, “My sushi is better, bitches!” That would be epic.

  3. A year ago this January I began a “if i don’t make it we don’t eat it” program. I have lost weight, I feel better and we’ve saved money. It’s just common sense. Thanks for preaching it.

      • Finding some foods without some form of sugar, is almost as hard as finding products not made in China. It is difficult, but not impossible, whereas finding something not made in China that is affordable is another story.

  4. Ew. Those things in the top picture even look moldy. I dunno why anyone would prefer to feed their kids those instead of real strawberries — which are just as sweet and even look like candy.

    And, yeah, the carb thing: Once I hit 40, the weight just kept creeping on, and I couldn’t lose it until I cut out carbs — and then suddenly — WHOOSH! — it just sorta melted off. Weird, frankly, but I’ll take it. Every two weeks I reward myself by baking something for the weekend.

  5. ha ha YES ! Thanks for the good thinking ! Now I’m inspired to eat a more well balanced diet in 2013 ! Even if I can’t diet, because I just don’t feel like it, less sugar and more veggies ! In my family we joke that the four basic food groups are chocolate, potato chips, caffeine and alcohol. :-)

  6. Marzipan – shaped and colored to look like fruit has always been one of my favorites. Tad expensive though. Beer is totally healthy . . . in moderation. — YUR

  7. Awesome post! Now if we could only get the school lunch people on board with it. At my old school where I taught in California, is was pop tarts and chocolate milk in the AM, and “Breakfast for Lunch” a heart killing, fat building pile of sausage, french toast sticks and gallons of fake maple syrup poured on, Oh, and don’t forget the chocolate milk! :P

  8. It always makes me laugh when I see fruit punch drinks that include the wording “does not contain fruit juice” because I think they should not be allowed to call it fruit punch.
    And high fructose corn syrup is good for you because it is made of corn. And corn is a vegetable. Doubly healthy! Yay for obesity as the children wobble to school.

  9. Thank you for sharing. I constantly need reminders to eat healthier, and that is my goal for 2013, to reach my fitness goals, and to compete in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu at a lower weight class. Thank you again!!!

  10. Staying away from flour and processed foods is so important. Some scientists and doctors are linking heart disease, cancer and weight gain to wheat. You might be interested in checking out a book called Wheat Belly.

  11. I got a sugar high just reading your post….good points all. So ask scooby, if I don’t drink a sugary drink a day will I lose 2 pounds a month? Best wishes for a safe happy sugar free new year.

  12. At first I thought you were writing about me! I do have a jelly belly. Great post. I need to get back on track….after a week in New Orleans….nothing healthy there food or otherwise.

  13. I don’t get the fruit snack thing either. Teachers let them pass as healthy snacks, but if you’ve got a baked chip, the snack is confiscated (a fried cracker is okay, though :) ) Go figure.

  14. You are SO right! I have recently moved to western Panama where there are tons of fresh fruits and veggies grown without a bunch of chemicals, and ripened in the fields. I eat whatever I want of the local food and avoid anything imported, wheat, or refined sugar and it’s been much easier to maintain my weight. The local produce also tastes amazing.

  15. Wow, and I thought I was the king of frugal living! Now that I’ve been dethroned I’m going to drown my sorrows in some high fructose corn syrup based snack. Bring on the Little Debbies!

  16. this was a very helpful post but what I wonder is a good selection of foods to fight Prostrate Cancer. In the UK it kills 10,000 men a year yet it is only now being brought into the open anything that can help fight that must be good to eat look forward to reading your thoughts

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